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new kitchen, specious lounge

While Damian was phoning his father, I was outside playing hack-n-slash with the secateurs. I managed a considerable reduction on the Most Pestilential Bush in the world, while gagging, swearing, and trying to avoid touching any of it (the whole thing is sticky with mealybugs, crawling with snails, buzzing with flies, crunchy with scale, and covered with this brownish powdery stuff -- presumably some sort of fungus -- which seems to affect a lot of the plants in the garden). I still have no idea what it is, which makes it hard to swear at it. Anyone got any ideas? It grows like a weed, has simple dark green evergreen leaves (like laurel or bay, except larger, squishier and foul-smelling) and small cream flowers that smell vaguely of wee.

After that I went off to misspend the rest of Sunday. All the Lord of the Rings figures had gone on sale in Toys'R'Us. There are fun sets of witch kings, selection packs of hobbits. I was being a bad consumer, however, and failed even to buy this.

In celebration of the solstice (and the successful flight of SpaceShipOne) this evening I am going to be drinking spiced cider and trying to build a table-top wicker-man. If all goes well, I'll burn it at midnight.

A reasonable use for garden waste.

Comments

( 15 worms — Feed the birds )
marstokyo
21st Jun, 2004 11:01 (UTC)
(the whole thing is sticky with mealybugs, crawling with snails, buzzing with flies, crunchy with scale, and covered with this brownish powdery stuff -- presumably some sort of fungus -- which seems to affect a lot of the plants in the garden).

sounds like our *President* Bush!
crazycrone
21st Jun, 2004 12:20 (UTC)
Ewwwww...
Scale gives me the horrors
cleanskies
22nd Jun, 2004 02:38 (UTC)
Mealy bugs are worse -- all hairy and sticky, like mould but alive (shudder).

... and horseflies, too? WTF is that about? Like there are any horses where I live!
motodraconis
21st Jun, 2004 13:01 (UTC)
I'd burn the wee smelling bush at midnight for good measure.
cleanskies
22nd Jun, 2004 02:16 (UTC)
it's too big
the whole garden would burn
badasstronaut
21st Jun, 2004 13:25 (UTC)
It grows like a weed, has simple dark green evergreen leaves (like laurel or bay, except larger, squishier and foul-smelling) and small cream flowers that smell vaguely of wee.

I've no idea what it is, but I'd like to see the it versus Animal Man crossover.
cleanskies
22nd Jun, 2004 02:32 (UTC)
what would be
the ideal animal powers for gardening?
badasstronaut
22nd Jun, 2004 02:43 (UTC)
Re: what would be
Hm. Moles have spade like hands for digging, but they also mae annoying holes and piles of earth. Worms are good at aerating the soil. Maybe it could be a worm/mole cross breed.
cleanskies
22nd Jun, 2004 03:01 (UTC)
Re: what would be
Perhaps he could harness the amazing bug-eating powers of ladybirds, lacewings and blue-tits and denude the garden of pests.

Actually, that would be pretty desgusting, wouldn't it?
badasstronaut
22nd Jun, 2004 03:12 (UTC)
Re: what would be
I dare you to draw that!
cleanskies
22nd Jun, 2004 03:20 (UTC)
Re: what would be
(shudders queasily)
ceciley
21st Jun, 2004 14:58 (UTC)
There might be one of them in my front garden.
cleanskies
22nd Jun, 2004 02:33 (UTC)
quick
kill it.

Or at least, prune it savagely.
ceciley
22nd Jun, 2004 04:34 (UTC)
Oh no. It's terribly useful as a litter-holder for all the students who thrust their empties in.
ingaborg
27th Jun, 2004 15:14 (UTC)
Wow, habitat!
You've probably got 5 rare species of insect living in that bush! Someone pointed out to me recently that the only reason rhododendrons look so glossy and healthy is that they are eaten by just about nothing in Britain (1 non-native bug, and 1 which eats anything) making them ecologically uselessl
( 15 worms — Feed the birds )