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shipwrecked on 2006

Well, the Marks & Spencers sale took a little longer than anticipated. Still, at least I know the answer to the question, who on earth would buy a chocolate brown and pink zebra-striped bra? now. In all fairness, I did take in a few other things on the way. A long, rambling phonecall to my mum in the park, in the snow. One of those parties. A New Year on the town featuring free gin, gig lunacy cover versions of Crazy Nights and Cars, and getting thumped by a drunk teenager. The entire first series of Ranma 1/2, Fruits Basket and Inu Yasha. Finally cracking and buying that bunch of red tulips I'd been hankering after since Christmas Eve.

Anyway, the hangover has receded, my fear has subsided and New Year's Resolutions must be made.

but first, a look at last year's set
  • In relationships that provoke anxiety, work towards estrangement indirectly.
    This referred chiefly to family relations, and this I did, all year. It didn't work, or significantly reduce anxiety. Time for a new approach.
  • Remember to finish giving away things that are for other people.
    Moving house helped here, and I did OK, plenty of parcels and presents sent out/passed on. More of the same next year.
  • Keep your hands tucked in.
    Literally, my hands are always scraped and scratched and beaten up because I'm careless with them. They're looking OK tonight, though, so I'll call that one kept.
  • Stop beating yourself up over walking into things.
    Ah, the first one I did very badly on. No progress on stopping blaming/hating self for accidents, embarassments and inadvertals. Oh well.
  • If the gap fits, step through it, if the job is doable, do it.
    Which I did, and oh, such a lot of trouble I got into. But look! A house, a hedge, a clean kitchen floor.
  • Have the escape plan ready to implement wherever, whenever, now.
    Failed. In fact, this year has mostly been spent painting myself into ever tighter corners.
  • An unrecorded experience is only half experienced.
    More a thought experiment than a resolution, and one I've come to disagree with; the relationship is more complex than that.
  • Eat less and drink more tea.
    Tea is, of course, a euphemism. I've either stuck quite well to this, or stress and late nights have done the job for me.
  • Never, ever throw anything away.
    This is an impossible ideal, of course, but I've moved closer to it this year, and will continue to do so.
All of this was a bit waffly and non-specific, though, to be honest. And a blatant attempt to set a bunch of resolutions I'd understand but no-one else would.

This year's much more brass tacks and practical:
  1. The little blue diary Last year I caught myself relying on other people's diaries, and this has to stop. I bought a pocket diary to see if I'd use it more than I use the Palm. Any dates that ought to be in it?
  2. Weekly creative dates I went out too much last year, and my longer-term projects suffered. This year I aim to spend one night a week at home with these. No internet, no IM, no cleaning, no phone, no TV, just me and whatever I'm working on. This night to be Thursday, Friday or Saturday -- otherwise it wouldn't be a proper date. Want to join me? We can stay in seperately together. Easy enough no matter where you live.
  3. Make a hobby of my house Too much time and energy last year spent resenting DIY, chores, housework, gardening; but it's just a big craft project, really, and one I can surely get my teeth into.
  4. Host some parties Yes, there were some last year, but the most recent one's the first I've felt really happy with. Now I'm ready to do a few with decent lead-time, themes, and other such lunacy ...
  5. Sell a few things Oh mumble yes well my finances aren't really holding together. Plus, all those wonderful things! I do love them, but it's likely someone may want them more.
  6. Get out of town Of course, going somewhere else isn't necessarily going to stop me feeling embattled and claustrophobic but it's got to be worth a try, right? Every month, if I can.
Now I'll go back to watching my tulips wither. I think the first petals will fall tonight ...*

Oh! I almost forgot. Spambot Random8 sent me this set of randomly-generated resolutions this morning:

photos

Base, anger plain brought. Thing up unit say, such, shall. Story
they notice talk, garden, turn great. Create plan those at.
Direct an course spring mean. Make tie day hunt. Toward, sure
small. War no, hot against son. From write long our develop
with. Course twenty tall water, finger their, cat. Give if,
been, clear how warm up. List, new save, direct. Face thick
idea, tree tiny job, yes.

The one about the cat sounds faintly worrying.

*They didn't. Such persistence.

Comments

( 44 worms — Feed the birds )
stylishbastard
4th Jan, 2006 00:49 (UTC)
An unrecorded experience is only half experienced.

I feel like this sometimes. More often I think single full experiences can be turned into other whole new experiences by recording and interpreting those records after the fact, what with all the different perspectives and all that. Anxious, thoughtful types can often squeeze a lot out of little things, for better and worse.

I hope you have a lovely 2006.
cleanskies
4th Jan, 2006 00:56 (UTC)
you too, spaceboy
hmm, that's part of it -- some things won't be made clearer by writing them down ... also the odd occasional urge to keep some experiences for yourself (in some sense) by not recording them. But then again some do seem to get what they need from being writ down/re-examined. Well, I might do some work on unpicking this; could likely benefit from it. Happy 2006!
Re: you too, spaceboy - darkpigeon - 4th Jan, 2006 01:29 (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - cleanskies - 4th Jan, 2006 11:29 (UTC) - Expand
sdn
4th Jan, 2006 01:06 (UTC)
who on earth would buy a chocolate brown and pink zebra-striped bra?

i want to know also.
cleanskies
4th Jan, 2006 01:19 (UTC)
um
it was only £5?
Re: um - sdn - 4th Jan, 2006 01:35 (UTC) - Expand
mr_snips
4th Jan, 2006 01:16 (UTC)
You got thumped by a drunk teenager?
As above.

cleanskies
4th Jan, 2006 01:19 (UTC)
in the kidneys, no less!
didn't I just tell you all about that down the pub?
(no subject) - (Anonymous) - 4th Jan, 2006 02:45 (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - cleanskies - 4th Jan, 2006 11:37 (UTC) - Expand
Re: in the kidneys, no less! - mr_snips - 4th Jan, 2006 09:45 (UTC) - Expand
benchilada
4th Jan, 2006 04:01 (UTC)
Make a hobby of my house Too much time and energy last year spent resenting DIY, chores, housework, gardening; but it's just a big craft project, really, and one I can surely get my teeth into.

Don't make it your life. Or I'll go mad on your behalf.

Wait. I've already gone mad over a house.

Wheeeeee.
cleanskies
4th Jan, 2006 11:31 (UTC)
not my life,
just a hobby.
benchilada
4th Jan, 2006 04:03 (UTC)
PS - "thumped by a drunk teenager." ?????????
cleanskies
4th Jan, 2006 11:35 (UTC)
I sat down in a space she was "saving for her friend" so she thumped me in the kidneys till I moved ... they were gone by the time I got back from the loos, I suspect her friend (who was actually sat on the other side of her) might have been a bit alarmed by the turn of events.
stevegreen
4th Jan, 2006 08:00 (UTC)
I bought a pocket diary to see if I'd use it more than I use the Palm. Any dates that ought to be in it?

5-6 August?
cleanskies
4th Jan, 2006 11:35 (UTC)
I was planning on being out of the country ;D
ceciley
4th Jan, 2006 09:18 (UTC)
I got a leopard print bra in the Topshop sales. Hurray animal print underwear!
badasstronaut
4th Jan, 2006 09:25 (UTC)
Hm... your icecream icon looks familiar to me.
badasstronaut
4th Jan, 2006 09:24 (UTC)
Has Jenni said anything to you about a possible tour up north in April?
motodraconis
4th Jan, 2006 09:51 (UTC)
If you need a place to stay/stoppover oup north I have space at mine for peeps.
:-)
yay! - cleanskies - 4th Jan, 2006 11:36 (UTC) - Expand
Re: yay! - motodraconis - 4th Jan, 2006 13:17 (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - jinty - 4th Jan, 2006 12:59 (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - motodraconis - 4th Jan, 2006 13:20 (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - badasstronaut - 4th Jan, 2006 13:51 (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - motodraconis - 4th Jan, 2006 17:02 (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - cleanskies - 4th Jan, 2006 11:21 (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - badasstronaut - 4th Jan, 2006 11:35 (UTC) - Expand
oh, - cleanskies - 4th Jan, 2006 11:39 (UTC) - Expand
Re: oh, - badasstronaut - 4th Jan, 2006 11:57 (UTC) - Expand
oh, magnolia's tolerable - cleanskies - 4th Jan, 2006 13:35 (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - jinty - 4th Jan, 2006 12:57 (UTC) - Expand
I'd go for April - cleanskies - 4th Jan, 2006 13:39 (UTC) - Expand
Re: I'd go for April - badasstronaut - 4th Jan, 2006 13:58 (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - badasstronaut - 4th Jan, 2006 13:57 (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - jinty - 4th Jan, 2006 14:02 (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - jackfirecat - 4th Jan, 2006 18:29 (UTC) - Expand
charleston
4th Jan, 2006 23:25 (UTC)
joining you on 1 and 2
had already gone and bought a "little blue diary" (exactly that!) before reading this - have been putting off solidifying 2 as a resolution because... er.. not sure why. Oh because I can't decide what day to pick.
cleanskies
5th Jan, 2006 02:04 (UTC)
wonder if it's the same model?
Borders, fabric binding, silver edges -- I looked for a while to find just the right one! I think going for a fixed day makes it hard -- and if you were dating a person it wouldn't always be the same night -- better chance this way of getting every week if I have three tries ...

This week it's Thursday.
Re: wonder if it's the same model? - (Anonymous) - 5th Jan, 2006 09:37 (UTC) - Expand
( 44 worms — Feed the birds )