Today the postman stopped me as I headed out to my local church to check out Midnight Mass possibilities (from 11.30, all welcome). I've got one for you, he said, I'm sure! And on the way into work a little girl grinned at me so hard I couldn't help laughing. Pink hair good!

I tried drawing a christmas card last night but any Christmas message which ends with "... everything's pointless ..." probably doesn't need sharing. Here are three favourites from my friends instead; ossi being sinister, Groc wrapping up spam and marstokyo tangled in eternity.

Christmas tree lights result in about 350 people needing attention at hospital each year. According to RoSPA, who should know. Trawling advice sites for work occasionally throws up gems.