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de-logo your life

Gods, I get bored in the afternoon. Tanking up on too much coffee at lunchtime provides sporadic entertainment at best.

Taking a wander through Flickr, discovered this elegant de-logo-ization set. I hate logos, a favourite excuse for rejecting a piece of clothing. Not that it can't be fun, in context -- like all those people with "bench" written across their breasts or bum or whatever. Resist, however, the natural urge to wrestle them to the ground and sit on the labelled parts -- it would be too boring and predictable, they'd roll their eyes, look bored and say something along the lines of, "yeah, like nobody's done that before". Like the time I was watching a press preview of Marat/Sade (three excerpts, own clothes) and I noticed that almost all of them had a Nike swoosh somewhere about their person. As they sang jolly songs about masturbation and simulated buggery on the lecture room floor it came to me that I really was watching the sex-slaves of capitalism. Performing. For me. They got a very good review.

Dickon's ego alerted me to this folder full of pictures of pretty scenesters. You could probably get similar from any style mag, but it's nice to have them delivered to your desk. Speaking of which, David Stevens' oeuvre also includes these rather stylish photos of a naked protest.

There I was thinking i-pod-omancy was my idea, and here now, all the cool kids have started doing it. The principle is basic enough -- ask a question, take the first song on random play on your music-player of choice as your answer: this 14-question variant is doing the rounds

1. How does the world see me? "Phorever People [Todd Terry mix]" - The Shamen
2. Will I have a happy life? "Fun for me" - Moloko
3. What do my friends really think of me? "Alphabet" - Jeffrey Lewis
4. Do people secretly lust after me? "Lazy Confessions" - The Moldy Peaches
5. How can I make myself happy? "Deep Thought" - Joby Talbot
6. What should I do with my life? "Open your heart" - The Human League
7. Why must life be so full of pain? "JourneyMan" - Chad Mason
8. How can I maximize my pleasure during sex? "Sequenz: Rex tremendae majestatis" - Mozart Requiem
9. Will I ever have children? "Darts of Pleasure" - Franz Ferdinand
10. Will I die happy? "It's called a heart" - Depeche Mode
11. What is some good advice for me? "Go (amphetamix)" - Moby
12. What is happiness? "Ring of Fire" - Grace Jones
13. What's my favourite fetish? "An extraordinary procession" - Vesuvius Club by Mark Gatiss
14. How will I be remembered? "Camel Toe" - Hawerchuk

If this looks like far too much effort, you could try a standard three-track reading:

Where I am now : I've seen it all - Bjork
Issues surrounding: For Annie - Edgar Allen Poe/Gavin Friday
Suggested action: Electrify - Beastie Boys

Or even go for the kamikaze single track fortune:
The Loneliness of Autumn - John Barry

As you may have noticed, my i-pod is a sadist. Or, at the very least, laughing at me.

So, it's just as well I have:

ColorQuiz.com Another dumb personality test to tell me what

"Jeremy's ACTUAL problem is: Does not want to be involved ..."

Read more about my restrained characteristics.

Oh, joy is me.


29th Sep, 2005 15:40 (UTC)
Pictures of Pretty Scenesters...
I see the trick to looking glam is to tilt the head back, look down your nose and go grayscale.

I may have to do some experiments with a camera, perhaps even I can look glamly superior if I follow these rules.

I did the colour test, it crashed on me the first time, but the second, (and third) try had results too scary to post up. Ga!
29th Sep, 2005 15:44 (UTC)
more tricks --
drop your jaw slightly to make your face look thinner, turn three-quarters on to the camera and adjust position until a cheekbone appears. And don't forget to overexpose the shot to smooth out that skin!

You don't think the colour test is deliberately making statements that are a) Provocative, i.e. provoke an emotional response, no matter what and b) so vague anyone can identify with them?

I beleive it's primarily intended as a therapy tool -- to identify issues a client may wish to work on.
29th Sep, 2005 15:50 (UTC)
Re: more tricks --
Isn't it weird that at naked protests the women are laughing and having a good time whereas the men all look shirty/oh-too-serious/like they're really worried about how they look/like they secretly think they look beautiful (delete as appropriate)?

Love and hugs
Matthew B
29th Sep, 2005 16:18 (UTC)
obviously not looking at the right things
Hmm, I hadn't noticed that. Maybe it's a deep-seated psychological thing -- internal genitalia provoking extrovert behaviour, external genitalia provoking introspection. A sort of freudian balancing act.
29th Sep, 2005 16:15 (UTC)
Re: more tricks --
I expected vague, and the answers weren't mean or nasty, but they were scarily close to stuff I've been saying to myself for a while. Almost word for word.
Ugh! Too freaky.

I don't have cheekbones, I do have mump-like facial bulges, will they do at a pinch?
29th Sep, 2005 16:29 (UTC)
pinch pinch
Hmmm, maybe I'm being overly harsh. I can't really deny that I'm fascinated by novelty and go all out to avoid conflict. On the other hand, statements like "Liable to bored by the humdrum" do strike the well, duh note.

There's some more background/philosophy on this older site but the online test is a lot more primitive.