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Back to the love stories, as time is running out for Track 2 (which belongs in April-June) so I set to laying it out, looking for places in the story I can slip in clues to the season, adjusting the tone; at the moment it's too aggressive, I'm after that helpless camaraderie that arises when you get really drunk and so something incredibly stupid at exactly the same time as someone else. The haiku I have is all wrong; It doesn't indicate season, it's brash and judgemental, it doesn't change direction at all. I spend fifteen minutes chasing the centre of what I want to say, counting off syllables on my fingers, trying not to cry with frustration at the inevitable fight with the last 1/2/-1 syllables, eyes flicking back and forth to the TV to stop me thinking too hard and losing the pattern. Halfway through I realise that a hand needs to be on someone's hip at this point, and grind my teeth in frustration. This is where I wanted to have them being kicked out of their mate's house. Can I fit in both? Or is that kicking-out scene indulgent/disruptive/too abrupt anyway? Actually, come to think of it, where is the sex? It's almost all implied, or off-camera. I fiddle a bit wondering whether to change that, but there is quite a lot of nudity, and with that hand it should be enough already. Then it's just the final scene, which still keeps on looking crowded out by the banal brash nonsense of the first two columns. Which is right but either too sad or not sad anough. I'll just have to hope I can fix it with the blacks.

Sick of fighting the script, have a bath instead, enough time before bed-time to do it right, with bubbles and music and a good hour to soak in, and something to read, of course. Angela Carter short stories and the Pet Shop Boys singing Nightlife tonight, and as for the bubbles; Precious Time, gold sparkly stuff scented with Ylang Ylang and Pachouli, chosen from among options straightforward (orange, honey, tea tree), abstract (happiness, sleep easy, forget the day) and strange (Flying Saucer, Japanese Hot Springs). It's a hard choice, but I feel the need for a little sparkle today. Soak, read, relax, then soap my head with the Beautiful hair bar (even though my hair's getting coarser and darker every day), rub tired legs with cooling tea-tree body wash, and sand off my face with blissfully butch IMPACT! facial scrub for men. That's me done, except for sitting, drying, moisturising (I decide against Dove, instead go for Blackberry and Raspberry Body Yoghurt) and the inevitable slathering on of E45. At which point, bed deferred by e-mails to answer and more ideas for (another) comic spinning round my head. But at least I'm relaxed for that now, soothed and calmed and covered in sparkly time.

One day I'll use forget the day in the morning, that'll learn me.

Comments

( 3 worms — Feed the birds )
(Deleted comment)
cleanskies
11th Jun, 2003 10:14 (UTC)
oh, I just opened it!
It has a fold-out case with six beautifuls pictures -- Corto looking moody, Corto reading a paper, Corto louging on some stone benches, Rasputin looking nasty, the Duchess and Shanghai Li looking beautiful and the final scene in the rice paddies ... un très beau spectacle indeed!
(Deleted comment)
cleanskies
12th Jun, 2003 06:51 (UTC)
watched it very late last night
and am now a bit yawny. Glittery eyes, indeed, shiny, tawney. Would you like me to bring it to pub next week to borrow?
(Deleted comment)
cleanskies
12th Jun, 2003 10:16 (UTC)
didn't I tell you?
it has English subtitles. Menus are no bother, half the words are the same anyway.

The commentary, now, I think that might be more of a challenge!
( 3 worms — Feed the birds )